The Oyster and the Pleaders

One day two pilgrims espied upon the sands of the shore an oyster that had been thrown up by the tide. They devoured it with their eyes whilst pointing at it with their fingers; but whose teeth should deal with it was a matter of dispute.

有一天，两个朝圣者在海边的沙滩上，发现了一只被潮水冲上岸的牡蛎。他们用眼睛把它吞了个饱，又用手指着它；可是这牡蛎究竟该由谁的牙齿来对付，却成了争执的话题。

When one stopped to pick up the prey the other pushed him away saying: "It would be just as well first to decide which of us is to have the pleasure of it. He who first saw it should swallow it, and let the other watch him eat."

一个人正要弯腰去捡这份猎物，另一个便把他推开，说道：“我们最好先商量清楚，这份美味该由咱们俩谁来享用。谁先看见它，就该由谁吞下它，让另一个在旁边看着他吃。”

"If you settle the affair that way," replied his companion, "I have good eyes, thank God."

“如果照你这个说法来定，”他的同伴回答道，“我的眼力可好得很，谢天谢地。”

"But my sight is not bad either," said the other, "and I saw it before you did, and that I'll stake my life upon."

“可我的眼力也不赖，”另一个说，“而且是我先看见它的，这一点我拿性命担保。”

"Well, suppose you did see it, I smelt it."

“好吧，就算是你先看见的，可我先闻到它的味道。”

During this lively interlude Justice Nincompoop arrived on the scene, and to him they appealed to judge their claims. The justice very gravely took the oyster, opened it, and put it into his mouth, whilst the two claimants looked on. Having deliberately swallowed the oyster, the justice, in the portentous tones of a Lord Chief Justice, said, "The court here awards each of you a shell, without costs. Let each go home peaceably."

正吵得起劲的时候，愚顽法官恰好路过此地，两人便请他来评判各自的理由。这位法官神情十分严肃地拿起牡蛎，把它撬开，当着两位原告的面，放进自己嘴里。他不慌不忙地把牡蛎咽了下去，然后摆出首席大法官那般威严的腔调，说道：“本庭裁定，你们二人各得一片贝壳，诉讼费用一概不予追偿。各自安安分分回家去吧。”

Reckon what it costs to go to law in these days. Then count what remains to most families. You will see that Justice Nincompoop draws all the money and leaves only the empty purse and the shells to the litigants.

算算如今打一场官司要花多少钱，再算算大多数人家还能剩下些什么。你就会明白，愚顽法官把所有的钱财都吞进了自己腹中，只给诉讼双方留下了空空的钱袋和几片贝壳。